...JUST FEEL.
don't think.
FEEL!
Friday, July 30, 2010
Ignorance. haha.
So...this situation is TERRIBLE. But OH EM GEE, this chicks brother is HILARIOUSSSSS!
Thursday, July 29, 2010
conflict.
You make my head hurt...
A solid 50% of the time that we are speaking to each other, you are annoying me
[most times on purpose i'm sure].
But then when i'm not talking to you...
i wish i was talking to you.
I miss you.
And when you are not with me...
I don't miss you much.
[If we are talking to each other at least]
But the minute I see you...
It's like i've missed you the WHOLE time you were gone.
I love being around you.
I'm so effin confused.
Wednesday, July 28, 2010
Hottest Breakthrough MC of 2010.
"Ink my whole body; I don't give a mother f*ck"
So...for those of you that have been living under a rock.
meet Wiz Khalifa. He is PURE genius.
The rest of the world was already aware of this,
but MTV recently decided to acknowledge his amazingness.
He is a BEAST. Click the link to see what I am talking about.
Wiz Khalifa.
The day his album drops...
I will be at best buy.
I'm getting it the day it comes out. No excuses.
Ahh, i think i may be a bit obsessive.
:)
meet Wiz Khalifa. He is PURE genius.
The rest of the world was already aware of this,
but MTV recently decided to acknowledge his amazingness.
He is a BEAST. Click the link to see what I am talking about.
Wiz Khalifa.
The day his album drops...
I will be at best buy.
I'm getting it the day it comes out. No excuses.
Ahh, i think i may be a bit obsessive.
:)
Tuesday, July 27, 2010
lol/jk
...those are the most frequently used lies, ever.
you keep saying "lol" and "jk".
but i think you are actually serious.
it kinda hurts.
oh well.
i'm a big girl now,
& big girls don't cry.
I'M READY TO FREAKING GRADUATE!
I hate APSU with everything in me.
First off, I hate the social aspect of that school.
I hate the atmosphere. It's so immature.
But time and time again they keep screwing me over.
This time they are messing with my education & my four year plan.
I am beyond pissed.
A quick synopsis:
I went to sign up for another class last night because it's a Fall I class and not a full Fall semester class the sign up date was not till last night. Anyway, when I get on the website to look at everything it shows me that my chemistry class has been dropped. Mind you, I signed up for that class in Apr. or May, and I have checked my status frequently throughout the summer to make sure everything was correct. Well, I start freaking out and go looking for the class again. Luckily, I find it. I try to sign up for it again, and this thing tells me that I am lacking a pre-requisite to be allowed to take the class. I have to take Math 1730 (pre-cal) to be able to take the course. YOU COMPLETE AND TOTAL ASSHOLES!!! Why would you let a person sign up for a class, and then a month before school be like "hey, guess what! you can't take this class". I could have taken that ish this summer and been done with it! Ugh. On top of this...almost ALL of the good teachers for pre-cal are taken. I got a decent one, i think. Then, I now have less hours than I want to have and finding an open class that fits my schedule will be close to IMPOSSIBLE. I'M SO EFFIN ANGRY IT'S UNBELIEVABLEEE!!!!!!!!!! And the icing on the cake, I could not even sign up for the class I wanted to sign up for. My advisor failed to tell me that the pass word I need to sign up for full fall semester classes is DIFFERENT than the one I need for Fall I classes! [which makes NO sense, btw. I'll be taking it all at the same time].
UGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
*God, I pray for peace, patience, and understanding right now*.
First off, I hate the social aspect of that school.
I hate the atmosphere. It's so immature.
But time and time again they keep screwing me over.
This time they are messing with my education & my four year plan.
I am beyond pissed.
A quick synopsis:
I went to sign up for another class last night because it's a Fall I class and not a full Fall semester class the sign up date was not till last night. Anyway, when I get on the website to look at everything it shows me that my chemistry class has been dropped. Mind you, I signed up for that class in Apr. or May, and I have checked my status frequently throughout the summer to make sure everything was correct. Well, I start freaking out and go looking for the class again. Luckily, I find it. I try to sign up for it again, and this thing tells me that I am lacking a pre-requisite to be allowed to take the class. I have to take Math 1730 (pre-cal) to be able to take the course. YOU COMPLETE AND TOTAL ASSHOLES!!! Why would you let a person sign up for a class, and then a month before school be like "hey, guess what! you can't take this class". I could have taken that ish this summer and been done with it! Ugh. On top of this...almost ALL of the good teachers for pre-cal are taken. I got a decent one, i think. Then, I now have less hours than I want to have and finding an open class that fits my schedule will be close to IMPOSSIBLE. I'M SO EFFIN ANGRY IT'S UNBELIEVABLEEE!!!!!!!!!! And the icing on the cake, I could not even sign up for the class I wanted to sign up for. My advisor failed to tell me that the pass word I need to sign up for full fall semester classes is DIFFERENT than the one I need for Fall I classes! [which makes NO sense, btw. I'll be taking it all at the same time].
UGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
*God, I pray for peace, patience, and understanding right now*.
Monday, July 26, 2010
...and the journey begins.
1 day. 24 hours. A little over 1400 min.
That’s all it took until
You tore through
My strongest weakness.
You broke every brick
That made the wall around my heart,
And dried every sea
That flowed with resentment.
You fought past the prison guards
That guarded my mind,
And stood at my feet
With my heart in your hand.
You pleaded me to trust.
Ensured that I had nothing to be scared of
But still my body shook with fear
And my eyes welled with confusion.
You pulled me in closely
And unlocked the chains
I thought only I had the key to.
You held out your hand
Waiting for me to take it
So we could begin our journey of love...
That’s all it took until
You tore through
My strongest weakness.
You broke every brick
That made the wall around my heart,
And dried every sea
That flowed with resentment.
You fought past the prison guards
That guarded my mind,
And stood at my feet
With my heart in your hand.
You pleaded me to trust.
Ensured that I had nothing to be scared of
But still my body shook with fear
And my eyes welled with confusion.
You pulled me in closely
And unlocked the chains
I thought only I had the key to.
You held out your hand
Waiting for me to take it
So we could begin our journey of love...
*it's unfinished for a reason...*
Saturday, July 24, 2010
I want you to be my superman.
"I need you to rescue me from my destiny. I'm trying to live right and give you whatever is left of me" - Drizzy.
<3
Friday, July 23, 2010
airplanessss
"Keri Hilson's" Facebook status: American just announced that they now charge $8.00 for blankets (in coach) on their aircrafts. I guarantee planes will be iceboxes now. SMDH.
FML.
FML.
What you see & what I see are polar opposites.
Dear Me,
You have been going up and down and around in circles lately for a reason you are still unsure of. There is a constant battle between you and your heart. Confusion consumes you about 90% of the time. But no one can be blamed, but you. Your faith in God is not where it needs to be. But you are taking baby steps to strengthen it and I am so so so proud of you. Trust in him to take care of EVERYTHING and you will be okay. A smart lady once told you, "you can't go to God with a problem and then give him options on how you want him to fix it. hand God your problem alone and He will ensure that it will be fixed. maybe not the way you want to or on your time, but it will be fixed." Trust baby. It's okay to trust. God loves you, and just in that you can take comfort.
Also, love yourself. Love yourself whole heartedly. You walk around like the girl who has got everything together and ALLL the confidence in the world. You never show people your weaknesses. You never show emotion. As autumn would say you like to think you are a human computer with a movie in your head of how life should go. She's right. But what you refuse to accept is that you are NOT a human computer. You have emotions [no matter how far into you they are locked, they're there]. And whether you want to accept it or not other people can see that too. Love yourself like God loves you. Love yourself like your family loves you. Love yourself like your friends love you. Love yourself because you are amazing inside and out. You are beautiful. You have a huge heart. You live to help others. You are genuine. You are smart. The list goes on. Love yourself, or no one will be able to love you.
You have a lot to learn baby. You have come a long way, but you have a long way to go. Always remember, you canNOT make everyone happy. No matter how hard you try someone will not be satisfied with what you are doing. However, the only person that matters is God. If he is satisfied with your lifestyle then all is right in the world. Also remember that your self-worth and beauty lies in YOUR hands. No one else's. You are beautiful. Stop searching for ways for OTHER people to assure you of that. You're self-confidence will radiate, when you find it.
Lastly, relationships. You have great friendships in your life. Ones you know will be around for a lifetime! However, you are lacking in the boyfriend/girlfriend relationship aspect of life. There is someone right now who is willing to do anything to make you happy and wants to be with you. You don't have to be "that girl." Don't push him away in fear. Fear is only created by the Devil. Learn to trust; let him help you. And if worst comes to worst and it turns out not to be what you wanted, trust that God will see you through.
You only have one life to live babygirl. Don't waste it away being afraid of everything.
Live.Laugh.Love <3.>
You have been going up and down and around in circles lately for a reason you are still unsure of. There is a constant battle between you and your heart. Confusion consumes you about 90% of the time. But no one can be blamed, but you. Your faith in God is not where it needs to be. But you are taking baby steps to strengthen it and I am so so so proud of you. Trust in him to take care of EVERYTHING and you will be okay. A smart lady once told you, "you can't go to God with a problem and then give him options on how you want him to fix it. hand God your problem alone and He will ensure that it will be fixed. maybe not the way you want to or on your time, but it will be fixed." Trust baby. It's okay to trust. God loves you, and just in that you can take comfort.
Also, love yourself. Love yourself whole heartedly. You walk around like the girl who has got everything together and ALLL the confidence in the world. You never show people your weaknesses. You never show emotion. As autumn would say you like to think you are a human computer with a movie in your head of how life should go. She's right. But what you refuse to accept is that you are NOT a human computer. You have emotions [no matter how far into you they are locked, they're there]. And whether you want to accept it or not other people can see that too. Love yourself like God loves you. Love yourself like your family loves you. Love yourself like your friends love you. Love yourself because you are amazing inside and out. You are beautiful. You have a huge heart. You live to help others. You are genuine. You are smart. The list goes on. Love yourself, or no one will be able to love you.
You have a lot to learn baby. You have come a long way, but you have a long way to go. Always remember, you canNOT make everyone happy. No matter how hard you try someone will not be satisfied with what you are doing. However, the only person that matters is God. If he is satisfied with your lifestyle then all is right in the world. Also remember that your self-worth and beauty lies in YOUR hands. No one else's. You are beautiful. Stop searching for ways for OTHER people to assure you of that. You're self-confidence will radiate, when you find it.
Lastly, relationships. You have great friendships in your life. Ones you know will be around for a lifetime! However, you are lacking in the boyfriend/girlfriend relationship aspect of life. There is someone right now who is willing to do anything to make you happy and wants to be with you. You don't have to be "that girl." Don't push him away in fear. Fear is only created by the Devil. Learn to trust; let him help you. And if worst comes to worst and it turns out not to be what you wanted, trust that God will see you through.
You only have one life to live babygirl. Don't waste it away being afraid of everything.
Live.Laugh.Love <3.>
Love,
your reflection who is learning to love you
Thursday, July 22, 2010
a MUST read.
This was honestly one of the MOST AMAZING books I have ever read.
It's a retelling of the book of Hosea in the Bible.
She makes it interesting to read.
I seriously did not wanna put this down the whole time i was reading.
It teaches you so much about God's unconditional love
while telling an interesting story all at the same time.
*Shoutout to Mrs. Karen for recommending and letting me borrow this*
ahh, it's just amazing.
you have to experience it for yourself though.
so if you have the time
READ IT!
Redeeming Love; Francine Rivers
there are two people I wanna tell everything to.
Dear You,
This is your fourth letter. You have become TOO important. I've gotta get a handle on this. Anyway, I want to tell you everything about how I feel when it comes to you. I think that is the only way to get out of this cycle. Seems easy right? Not at all. Everytime I try I get shy. Oh well. If you are meant to know i'll find a way to show you then, but if not then so be it.
This is your fourth letter. You have become TOO important. I've gotta get a handle on this. Anyway, I want to tell you everything about how I feel when it comes to you. I think that is the only way to get out of this cycle. Seems easy right? Not at all. Everytime I try I get shy. Oh well. If you are meant to know i'll find a way to show you then, but if not then so be it.
Love,
Me :)
Dear Mr. Know it all :),
When I first started this letter challenge I never thought you would be the one i choose to write to on this topic. Ha, i'm still slightly unsure of it but whatever. You were right about pretty much everything. You read me like a book. I want to tell you everything, but I can't. Not yet. One thing you MUST know that as well as you can read me, I still know myself better. If you push too hard, i'll run the other way. I don't want that to happen.
Love,
The competitive one
Dear God,
Guide me in the right direction. I want you to take control of every aspect of my life. I know I can't do this on my own. I have been going CRAZY trying. Please, cure my confusion. Thank you! <3
Love,
your child, Zakia.
Wednesday, July 21, 2010
things like this remind me why I became a coach :)
as much as I complain about coaching in Clarksville i canNOT help but love it.
when I first started there last year I started coaching a pre-team class.
I have watched these kids grow and mature for the past year.
they are my babies. I love them like they are my own.
as of today, the original ones I started with are now competitive gymnasts who will compete this upcoming season.
my joy cannot be expressed in words.
I am SO proud of these girls. It makes me feel amazing to know I helped get them there.
They are too young to realize how much I love them, and how much they mean to me.
When they are grown they probably won't remember being in my class
However, I will ALWAYS hold them close to my heart.
[confession; I think i might cry the first time I see them compete. seriously].
interesting fact.
...I long to be trusted. I LOVE the feeling of being trusted.
However, I refuse to trust. Not easily at least.
Yet, I wonder how I attract emotional friends?
[by needing to be trusted, duh].
Makes no sense to me either.
At times the MOST confusing thing in the world to me is...me.
Haha. Wow.
I'm pretty much ridiculous.
point, blank, period.
However, I refuse to trust. Not easily at least.
Yet, I wonder how I attract emotional friends?
[by needing to be trusted, duh].
Makes no sense to me either.
At times the MOST confusing thing in the world to me is...me.
Haha. Wow.
I'm pretty much ridiculous.
point, blank, period.
I've changed.
Lifechanger,
You came into my life and turned everything upside down. Somewhere between the very first night I ever talked to you on the phone (which I still remember, btw) and now, I lost myself in you. I lost who I was to be who I thought you wanted. This is terrible. However, now that I realize it i'm on a quest for myself again. Not who I was because no matter how much I want her i'll probably never get her back, but i'm searching for who I need to become. I'm searching for what makes me happy, and more importantly what makes God happy. I would not change anything about this experience for the world because you have taught me SOOOO much, and you have been there for me more times than I can count. Although, i'm positive this experience is not over I know that I will be enduring the rest of this experience as me, myself, and I. Thank you, and I mean that from the bottom of my soul. I love you.
You came into my life and turned everything upside down. Somewhere between the very first night I ever talked to you on the phone (which I still remember, btw) and now, I lost myself in you. I lost who I was to be who I thought you wanted. This is terrible. However, now that I realize it i'm on a quest for myself again. Not who I was because no matter how much I want her i'll probably never get her back, but i'm searching for who I need to become. I'm searching for what makes me happy, and more importantly what makes God happy. I would not change anything about this experience for the world because you have taught me SOOOO much, and you have been there for me more times than I can count. Although, i'm positive this experience is not over I know that I will be enduring the rest of this experience as me, myself, and I. Thank you, and I mean that from the bottom of my soul. I love you.
Love,
The changed
you made me smile.
Dear the nicest person i knew for one day,
Thank you for your random act of kindness whatever it may have been. I pray that I greeted it with kindness in return. I'm sorry that I don't remember you, but i'm only human and my mind fails me more times than it doesn't. Lol. Anyway, never let anyone change who you are because there are many people that will try. Maintain your big heart because the world needs MORE of it.
Thank you for your random act of kindness whatever it may have been. I pray that I greeted it with kindness in return. I'm sorry that I don't remember you, but i'm only human and my mind fails me more times than it doesn't. Lol. Anyway, never let anyone change who you are because there are many people that will try. Maintain your big heart because the world needs MORE of it.
Love,
someone you inspired at one point in time.
Tuesday, July 20, 2010
she's BEYOND amazing.
there is this girl. her name is Lelia Renee. She completes me :). I love doing collaborations with her because she finished my thoughts perfectly, and she is such an AMAZING writer. When I grow up my skills will be as immaculate as hers! I love her more than anything in the world. She is the love of my life. I'm so glad I met her, and I hope she knows that we will be friends for a lifetime and more. <3.
Me:
i can't see them coming down my eyes
so i have to make my pen cry.
as my paper soaks up my deepest emotions
i feel my cheeks moisten with fear,
but i can't look in the mirror
and face the defeat
that lies unmovable in the gloss of my eyes.
my eye lashes collect drops
of confusion, discontentment, and frustration
as powerful as a thousand seas.
and in each tear that i watch fall off the tip of my nose
and drop onto the paper
is filled the vision of what you & i could have been...
lelia:
...what you and i should've been...
you promised me that you would never love again...
you lied...
those nights i laid next to you meant nothing after the months passed...
hot soak in the tub...cold wine glass
i tried to soak away my sorrows...
i asked for nothing more than you...fully
and you never even offered it to me.
pain
thats what you left me...
and confusion, discontentment, and frustration is all i see...
"why could you not love me?"
was i not what i needed to be?
and as pain fills the back of my eyes...
i'll allow myself to do the only thing i can do...
imma cry...
imma get this -ish out...
and my pen will hate me in the morning for such a workout...
my heart will feel lighter...
it was about to pour out...
and my mind will thank me...
because this is the last time you will be thought about...
i hope you like it :)
Monday, July 19, 2010
deep down when i face it all i want is you...
"...it's hard to move on when you always regret one"
- j.cole
gotta catch up on letters.
Dear Mr. and Mrs. Cornelius,
I cannot thank you enough for making it possible for our youth to go on that mission trip to Ecuador last summer. That was honestly one of the most amazing experiences of my life, and definitely my favorite memory. I cannot put into words how life altering it was. It's something i will never forget. Despite that I have told you guys thank you a million and one times I will never feel like I have said it enough. Thank you. I love you guys SO much! <3.>
I cannot thank you enough for making it possible for our youth to go on that mission trip to Ecuador last summer. That was honestly one of the most amazing experiences of my life, and definitely my favorite memory. I cannot put into words how life altering it was. It's something i will never forget. Despite that I have told you guys thank you a million and one times I will never feel like I have said it enough. Thank you. I love you guys SO much! <3.>
Love,
Zakia.
Zakia.
To: A broken soul,
I am not sure of what you are going through, and even if you told me I may not be able to understand. However, I can assure you that you are not alone. No matter what you are going through either someone else is going through it or someone has gone through it and made it. God will not give you more than you can handle. Although it may seem like it at the time...you will get through whatever is bringing you down. Trust. Faith. Love. Prayer. That is all you need. If you need me, call me/text me/fbook me/stalk me lol. I don't care. If you need me; i'll be here. You can talk, cry, yell, or just sit and stare. Put it in God's hands and you won't have to worry anymore.
I am not sure of what you are going through, and even if you told me I may not be able to understand. However, I can assure you that you are not alone. No matter what you are going through either someone else is going through it or someone has gone through it and made it. God will not give you more than you can handle. Although it may seem like it at the time...you will get through whatever is bringing you down. Trust. Faith. Love. Prayer. That is all you need. If you need me, call me/text me/fbook me/stalk me lol. I don't care. If you need me; i'll be here. You can talk, cry, yell, or just sit and stare. Put it in God's hands and you won't have to worry anymore.
Love,
someone who wants to help you
someone who wants to help you
ps - "and after you have suffered for a little while, the God of all grace, who called you to his eternal glory in Christ, will in Himself perfect, confirm, strengthen, and establish you" 1 Peter 5:10. Don't lose hope, baby.
Dear Ms. Chanel,
You are the last person I made a pinky promise too. I cannot remember what it was about, but i'm pretty sure you failed to realize how serious I was. Pinky promises are no joke to me. Yes, i'm weird. But you love me anyway :) <3.>
Dear Ms. Chanel,
You are the last person I made a pinky promise too. I cannot remember what it was about, but i'm pretty sure you failed to realize how serious I was. Pinky promises are no joke to me. Yes, i'm weird. But you love me anyway :) <3.>
Love,
your FAVORITE ahole.
your FAVORITE ahole.
simplicity is beauty.
"So Simple" Stacie Orrico
(It could all be so simple, simple)
Don't need high heels
For a good feel
You can keep the fancy clothes
I'll take walkin in the rain
Over things material
I'll trade Melrose and the big names
Give me faces that I know
Just play a melody that everybody knows
Take it down, down, down
And strip it to the core
I don't really need much less is more, more, more
[CHORUS:]
True to life, true to me
The way it's got to be
So simple, so simple, so simple
Live to love, love to be
Absolutely free
(so simple, so simple, simple)
Give me wisdom, plain and truthful
Teach me somethin I don't know
Plain as education, inspiration I suppose (yeah yeah)
Give me family, on a Sunday
And I'll be just fine
There's nothing in the world
That's worth more of my time
Take it down, down, down
And strip it to the core
I don't really need much less is more, more, more
[CHORUS x2]
Livin my dream, is my song to the world
(let 'em hear it)
Sharin' my soul and spirit
I'm hopin that you hear it
Got one (one) life (life) to live (live)
It's only what you make it (make it)
Every new day's a chance worth takin
[CHORUS x2]
Sunday, July 18, 2010
you intoxicate me in the worst way.
*stole this from my friend's facebook!*
"Throughout the centuries, love has been defined in many ways. In today's society, most people relate love to a deep feeling of sexual desire and attraction. They believe that as long as the sex is incredible, then love is definately blooming in the air. Too many people confuse lust and sex and end up trapped in toxic relationships"
i am stuck in one of these. however; i'm on my way out. it's a hard process :/.
Friday, July 16, 2010
i don't kiss && tell ;)
Dear the Last Person I Kissed,
You have had 2 letters prior to this, and if I remember correctly you have one or two more left on the list. You are a big part of my life, maybe too big. That's all. I've said too much to you as it is.
You have had 2 letters prior to this, and if I remember correctly you have one or two more left on the list. You are a big part of my life, maybe too big. That's all. I've said too much to you as it is.
Love,
zakiaaaa <3.
Come as you are; Pocket Full of Rocks.
He's not mad at you
He's not disappointed
His grace is greater still, than all of your wrong choices
He is full of mercy and he is ever kind
Hear his invitation,
His arms are open wide
You can come as you are,
with all your broken pieces
And all your shameful scars
The pain you hold in your heart,
bring it all to Jesus
You can come as you are
Louder than the voice that whispers your unworthy
Hear the sound of love,
that tells a different story
Shattering your darkness and pushing through the lies
How tenderly he calls you,
His arms are open wide
You can come as you are,
with all your broken pieces
And all your shameful scars
The pain you hold in your heart,
bring it all to Jesus
You can come as you are
You can come as you are
You can come as you are
with all your broken pieces
And all your shameful scars
The pain you hold in your heart,
bring it all to Jesus
You can come as you are
He's not disappointed
His grace is greater still, than all of your wrong choices
He is full of mercy and he is ever kind
Hear his invitation,
His arms are open wide
You can come as you are,
with all your broken pieces
And all your shameful scars
The pain you hold in your heart,
bring it all to Jesus
You can come as you are
Louder than the voice that whispers your unworthy
Hear the sound of love,
that tells a different story
Shattering your darkness and pushing through the lies
How tenderly he calls you,
His arms are open wide
You can come as you are,
with all your broken pieces
And all your shameful scars
The pain you hold in your heart,
bring it all to Jesus
You can come as you are
You can come as you are
You can come as you are
with all your broken pieces
And all your shameful scars
The pain you hold in your heart,
bring it all to Jesus
You can come as you are
silly me; He was right in front of my face.
So...a few weeks ago I had a series of depressing posts
about needing someone to talk to
needing a confidant, and falling apart.
sad, sad, sad. blah, blah, blah.
well guess what...
I FOUND MY CONFIDANT.
& i feel like an idiot because He has always been right in front of my face.
I want to thank Kairo Roots Bible Study at Brentwood Baptist for this great epiphany.
No matter what your problem is...
God is bigger than it.
God is my confidant who I know will NEVER let me down.
about needing someone to talk to
needing a confidant, and falling apart.
sad, sad, sad. blah, blah, blah.
well guess what...
I FOUND MY CONFIDANT.
& i feel like an idiot because He has always been right in front of my face.
I want to thank Kairo Roots Bible Study at Brentwood Baptist for this great epiphany.
No matter what your problem is...
God is bigger than it.
God is my confidant who I know will NEVER let me down.
Thursday, July 15, 2010
second chance? to give or not to give? lol
I've always been one to give second chances. The only problem is I tend to give them to the wrong people :/.
But I don't have anyone I want to give a second chance to. So i have no letter to write today.
boring!
Wednesday, July 14, 2010
left behind...
...i feel like everyone around me is doing big things.
like they are all making big moves in their lives
and i'm just sitting by watching.
as i've said before
people keep telling me they are proud of me
and that i'm doing big things.
but i can't see it.
i wanna do something big.
something i can see.
i'm missing something in my life.
thankfully, i think i know what it is.
i'm working on it.
Only God can judge me.
"Never judge a book by it's cover"
I try to live by that quote, but i'm human therefore I fall short of perfection. So...
Dear Anyone I have judged,
I'm sorry for passing judgement on you without taking the time to get to know you. I hope that farther down the line I got over my ignorance and took interest in the person you are instead labeling you as what I expected you to be. However, if I did not i'm sorry. That is really all I can say. In actuality though, it's more so my loss. I could have missed out on a great person. So, i'll say sorry to myself as well.
Love,
Someone who hates to be judged.
Tuesday, July 13, 2010
heartbrokennnn
Well…I’ve been hurt, but no one has ever broken my heart. However, it seems like it is a part of life (sad, right?). So this is a letter to whoever breaks it down the line.
Dear Heartbreaker,
Whatever I may have done to deserve to get my heart broken or even if I did nothing, all I can do is pray that at whatever point in my life this occurs that I am strong enough to handle it. I also hope that your heart is not broken in the process. It hurts me more to hurt someone else than to be hurt myself.
Love,
the heartbroken (eventually)
Monday, July 12, 2010
not a day goes by when you are not on my mind.
To whom it may concern:
There has not been a day since I met you that you have not been on my mind. It’s actually quite ridiculous how much I think about you. However, as of lately my thoughts have not been so pleasant. I hate what our relationship has become. I hate what i have let it become. I wish I could go back and stop this terrible circle I’m (we're) now stuck in, but I can’t. So, now I must break the circle. I keep thinking of ways to do it, but I keep second guessing thinking it won’t work. That’s probably because we have both tried to break this circle multiple times, but we always end up back in it. I wonder if any of what I feel due to this, you feel. I doubt it, but it’s a thought. Anyhow, I have to get out of this circle. I’ve got to get out of it fast. I pray and hope I don’t lose you in the process (i think my fear of that has stopped me from efforts of getting out of it). But, I love you baby no matter what happens.
There has not been a day since I met you that you have not been on my mind. It’s actually quite ridiculous how much I think about you. However, as of lately my thoughts have not been so pleasant. I hate what our relationship has become. I hate what i have let it become. I wish I could go back and stop this terrible circle I’m (we're) now stuck in, but I can’t. So, now I must break the circle. I keep thinking of ways to do it, but I keep second guessing thinking it won’t work. That’s probably because we have both tried to break this circle multiple times, but we always end up back in it. I wonder if any of what I feel due to this, you feel. I doubt it, but it’s a thought. Anyhow, I have to get out of this circle. I’ve got to get out of it fast. I pray and hope I don’t lose you in the process (i think my fear of that has stopped me from efforts of getting out of it). But, I love you baby no matter what happens.
Love,
a girl thats always got your back!
the person i WILL be one day.
Dear Me,
You are who I want to be. I want to be successful. I want to be happy. I want to be loved, and I want to love. I want to be so wrapped up in my God that whoever loves me has to love him first. I want to lose my old bad habits, and make new good ones. I want to keep my big heart and need to help others, I want to be changed. I want to feel new and refreshed. I want to be me, just revamped :).
You are who I want to be. I want to be successful. I want to be happy. I want to be loved, and I want to love. I want to be so wrapped up in my God that whoever loves me has to love him first. I want to lose my old bad habits, and make new good ones. I want to keep my big heart and need to help others, I want to be changed. I want to feel new and refreshed. I want to be me, just revamped :).
Love,
Your past.
childhood memories!
Dear BFF,
Oh my gosh. We did everything together as children. We met in the 3rd grade, I think. We were best friends from then till about 7th or 8th grade. You were like a part of my family. You were my sister. You have been through hell and back, and you have made it through all of it. I’m so proud of how strong you are. I miss the good old days. I miss studying with you (in the closet with a flash light). I miss making LONG walks to j.t. moore just to see some boy, haha. I miss the good times we had with my brothers, our brothers. I miss the times we had at your house. I miss you. I still talk to you on occasion when I catch you on facebook, but it’s nothing like it used to be. I’m sorry that we fell apart, but I’m so grateful that you were once a big part of my life. I pray that where ever you are in life that you are happy and doing well. I love you!
Oh my gosh. We did everything together as children. We met in the 3rd grade, I think. We were best friends from then till about 7th or 8th grade. You were like a part of my family. You were my sister. You have been through hell and back, and you have made it through all of it. I’m so proud of how strong you are. I miss the good old days. I miss studying with you (in the closet with a flash light). I miss making LONG walks to j.t. moore just to see some boy, haha. I miss the good times we had with my brothers, our brothers. I miss the times we had at your house. I miss you. I still talk to you on occasion when I catch you on facebook, but it’s nothing like it used to be. I’m sorry that we fell apart, but I’m so grateful that you were once a big part of my life. I pray that where ever you are in life that you are happy and doing well. I love you!
Love,
Your BFF!
Saturday, July 10, 2010
i'm a dreamer.
...but not the dreamer that dreams by night.
i day dream.
and those day dreams are followed by actions
to fulfill my dreams.
i WILL reach my goals.
[God willing!]
Friday, July 9, 2010
for you.
this is to the one person [outside of my family] that has NEVER let me down.
Dear Someone out of my state,
First things first, i love you. point, blank, period. NOTHING will ever change that. I honestly don't deserve you. I don't deserve for you to be such an AMAZING friend to me because i have been a TERRIBLE friend to you. I was also a TERRIBLE girlfriend to you. I'm sorry for what happened between us. Whether you believe me or not, i am UNBELIEVABLY sorry for that and I will forever feel terrible about that. It hurt me to hurt you. You are one of the sweetest guys i know, and you have one of the biggest hearts once you become friends with someone. it killed me to hurt that. However, despite all of that you still came back to me and remained my friend. you are ALWAYS there for me no matter what is going on. i could have not talked to you for 6 or more months and if i call you crying you will talk to me and calm me down like we have not missed a beat. i wish i could rewind time and realize what i had at the time, but you live and you learn right? thats what they tell me at least. there are so many experiences with you i wish i could re-do, but we don't have time machines so i gotta deal with it. i really wish there was a way that i could express how much you mean to me, but there is not. i'm sorry for everything [for hurting you. not spending enough time with you. being a TERRIBLE friend. not seeing you when you came to visit]. thank you for everything you have done for me, all the times you have been there for me, and the smiles you have given me. you are one of the strongest and sweetest guys i know. i cannot wait for the day that someone sweeps you off your feet because you deserve it. you deserve to be loved and love [& i hope it's with her. i wish you the BEST of luck with that situation]. i honestly want you to be happy. no matter what happens between us, thats what i want for you. i love you more than you will ever know, and i will ALWAYS be here for youu!
First things first, i love you. point, blank, period. NOTHING will ever change that. I honestly don't deserve you. I don't deserve for you to be such an AMAZING friend to me because i have been a TERRIBLE friend to you. I was also a TERRIBLE girlfriend to you. I'm sorry for what happened between us. Whether you believe me or not, i am UNBELIEVABLY sorry for that and I will forever feel terrible about that. It hurt me to hurt you. You are one of the sweetest guys i know, and you have one of the biggest hearts once you become friends with someone. it killed me to hurt that. However, despite all of that you still came back to me and remained my friend. you are ALWAYS there for me no matter what is going on. i could have not talked to you for 6 or more months and if i call you crying you will talk to me and calm me down like we have not missed a beat. i wish i could rewind time and realize what i had at the time, but you live and you learn right? thats what they tell me at least. there are so many experiences with you i wish i could re-do, but we don't have time machines so i gotta deal with it. i really wish there was a way that i could express how much you mean to me, but there is not. i'm sorry for everything [for hurting you. not spending enough time with you. being a TERRIBLE friend. not seeing you when you came to visit]. thank you for everything you have done for me, all the times you have been there for me, and the smiles you have given me. you are one of the strongest and sweetest guys i know. i cannot wait for the day that someone sweeps you off your feet because you deserve it. you deserve to be loved and love [& i hope it's with her. i wish you the BEST of luck with that situation]. i honestly want you to be happy. no matter what happens between us, thats what i want for you. i love you more than you will ever know, and i will ALWAYS be here for youu!
Love,
a girl who will forever & always love you
ps - you need to hurry up and have a baby so i can be a god mommy ;)
Chris J - Don't Need No Man (Feat. Plies J) [NEW SINGLE 2009 SONG] (HD)
if you like what you here, and you wanna here more...
click here to get his mixtape.
do it.do it.do it. you know you wanna :D!
this is a MUST see.
please, please, please watch this movie.i promise you will laugh harder than you have EVER laughed in your whole life.
this is the funniest thing, ever.
black dynamiiiiiiiteeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!
boredom cureee.
if you are bored and need something to do...
click hereee :)
it will entertain you for a good amount of time.
enjoy.
click hereee :)
it will entertain you for a good amount of time.
enjoy.
Thursday, July 8, 2010
i miss you; for real this time.
Dear "Old Times",
I miss your innocence. I miss your smile. I miss your optimism. I miss your social nature. I miss your ability to LIGHT up a room no matter what was going on in your head. I miss your strength. I miss your sweetness. I miss how passionate you were. I miss you. I don't know what changed. I don't where you went. All I know is that I want you back.
I miss your innocence. I miss your smile. I miss your optimism. I miss your social nature. I miss your ability to LIGHT up a room no matter what was going on in your head. I miss your strength. I miss your sweetness. I miss how passionate you were. I miss you. I don't know what changed. I don't where you went. All I know is that I want you back.
Love,
The person you have become.
If this is what I get to look like at 50; I can't freaking wait!
geez; my mom is such a freaking cutieeee <3.
ugh, this sucks.
i am becoming a FREAKING WHALE!!
oh my gosh. it's terrible.
i HAVE to lose weight, PRONTO!
rules going into affect starting NOW:
1. No more fast food.
2. No more eating after 8 pm.
3. No more JUNK FOOD!
4. workout monday through friday.
5. ONLY eat when hungry; not when bored.
oh my gosh. it's terrible.
i HAVE to lose weight, PRONTO!
rules going into affect starting NOW:
1. No more fast food.
2. No more eating after 8 pm.
3. No more JUNK FOOD!
4. workout monday through friday.
5. ONLY eat when hungry; not when bored.
goal: 10 lbs.
[maybe more after i reach that?].
Wednesday, July 7, 2010
i miss you.
[ ...okay i lied.
i don't miss you.
this is supposed to be my letter to someone i have drifted away from.
i can think of people.
but no one worthy of a letter.
i guess i'll do a group letter. ]
Dear You,
Whether we talked rarely or we talked everyday i'm sorry we drifted a part. It could be my fault, it could be your fault, or it could be no ones fault. Either way, i pray that your life is giong well and that you are happy. I also pray that you know that i'll always be here for you. I don't care if we have talked once or we talked once every hour. If i once called you a friend, i will always call you a friend, and i'll always be here for you. :) <3.>
i don't miss you.
this is supposed to be my letter to someone i have drifted away from.
i can think of people.
but no one worthy of a letter.
i guess i'll do a group letter. ]
Dear You,
Whether we talked rarely or we talked everyday i'm sorry we drifted a part. It could be my fault, it could be your fault, or it could be no ones fault. Either way, i pray that your life is giong well and that you are happy. I also pray that you know that i'll always be here for you. I don't care if we have talked once or we talked once every hour. If i once called you a friend, i will always call you a friend, and i'll always be here for you. :) <3.>
Love,
someone you will ALWAYS find a friend in.
I'm Sorry.
Dear Anyone I have hurt,
I am not aware of anyone having a grudge against me, however i'm sure someone does. To that person (or persons) I am truly sorry for any pain or grievance I have caused you, and I hope that you are able to forgive me. <3.>
I am not aware of anyone having a grudge against me, however i'm sure someone does. To that person (or persons) I am truly sorry for any pain or grievance I have caused you, and I hope that you are able to forgive me. <3.>
Love,
Zakia
Someone who hurt me the most?
Dear Stranger,
I have not met you yet, but i'm sure you will arise at some point in my future. All I can really say to you is I hope by the time we meet I am strong enough to withstand any pain you may cause me.
I have not met you yet, but i'm sure you will arise at some point in my future. All I can really say to you is I hope by the time we meet I am strong enough to withstand any pain you may cause me.
Love,
someone who has yet to be TRULY hurt.
RiP babyboy
*I gotta get through this without crying :/*
Dear Noah,
I miss you more than can be fathomed. You truly are the most BEAUTIFUL person I was ever granted the chance to meet. I went to school with you for three years, and I lived down the street from you for more than that. I have NEVER seen you without a smile on your face. No matter what was going on you found a way to smile. I admire that, and I am definitely striving to be more like that. You were always ready to lend a helping hand, and you were always the most hype for our school. Ahhh, great memories of just watching you at pep rallys. It's crazy the pride you took in our school. I miss running down the hallway just to give you a hug and walk away. I miss seeing your smile from a mile away. I miss seeing you and zach acting CRAZY in the hall ways. I miss all the crazy times we had outside my house and at the lake. I miss seeing you and christie being absolutely adorable. I swear you two were getting married!! I just miss youuuuu, plain & simple. No one will ever compare to you. Thank you for every hug and smile you ever gave to me. I'll never forget it. Because of you I learned the preciousness of life. It can be over in a blink of an eye. I have finally come to terms with this. I am no longer waiting for someone to say just kidding. I now know that you are happier than ever possible up there in heaven. I love you more than you will ever know or understand. Rest in Peace. Keep an eye on us down here because we need it! I'll see you again one day :).
Love,
A girl who never really appreciated you :/
*i'm a G. i did it without crying :)*
Letter to someone I don't talk to as much.
To be completely honest, i'm content with the people I talk to on a regular basis.
*scratch that; i just had a thought of someone!*
Dear Sister,
I wish we talked more. I wish I was a bigger part of my neice's life. I wish she actually remembered me, ha. I wish we were closer, but I guess since we did not really grow up around each other it's understandable. However, the times I have spent with you have been absolutely amazing. I love coming to Boston to visit you and your family (well they're my family too :)). I love you dearly! Can't wait to come visit again.
*scratch that; i just had a thought of someone!*
Dear Sister,
I wish we talked more. I wish I was a bigger part of my neice's life. I wish she actually remembered me, ha. I wish we were closer, but I guess since we did not really grow up around each other it's understandable. However, the times I have spent with you have been absolutely amazing. I love coming to Boston to visit you and your family (well they're my family too :)). I love you dearly! Can't wait to come visit again.
Love,
Your baby sister.
ps - in case you did not know...i look up to you :).
Someone i'd like to meet.
Dear a person i'd like to meet,
I have read proably every poem you have ever written. Your words are amazing, and the way you piece them together is phenomenal. The emotion that can be heard in your writing is crazy. Its like your reader can feel what you are feeling. I want to meet you just so I can ask how to better my writing. Not that I want to go public or become famous with mine. I just want to better explain myself. I think you could help with that tremendously.
Love,
a pretty big fan of yours.
favorite internet friend.
oddly enough; i have one of these :).
Dear "internet friend",
I'll start with saying I LOVE YOU! because i do, very very much. Um, we met through myspace, haha. lame. i can't even remember how or why we started talking, but i'm glad we did. the summer that we talked ALLL DAY; EVERYYY DAYY was amazing. i loved our intellectual conversations about religion, politics, love, the universe. anything either of us had on our mind we discussed it. and we were both insanely intrigued. i loved it. i miss it!! surprisingly enough, i think you know more about me than most of my friends. i don't know what it is, but talking to you was insanely easy! thank you for all the times that you have been a listening ear, and thank you SO MUCH for all the advice you have given me. you have helped me in more ways than i can explain. i'm truly grateful! :). i canNOT wait to come visit you in new orleans [which we need to plan, PRONTO sir] because i HAVE to meet you in person. you are TOO amazing. THANK YOU FOR EVERRYYYYTHINGGG!! we are definitely more than just internet friends! i <3>
Dear "internet friend",
I'll start with saying I LOVE YOU! because i do, very very much. Um, we met through myspace, haha. lame. i can't even remember how or why we started talking, but i'm glad we did. the summer that we talked ALLL DAY; EVERYYY DAYY was amazing. i loved our intellectual conversations about religion, politics, love, the universe. anything either of us had on our mind we discussed it. and we were both insanely intrigued. i loved it. i miss it!! surprisingly enough, i think you know more about me than most of my friends. i don't know what it is, but talking to you was insanely easy! thank you for all the times that you have been a listening ear, and thank you SO MUCH for all the advice you have given me. you have helped me in more ways than i can explain. i'm truly grateful! :). i canNOT wait to come visit you in new orleans [which we need to plan, PRONTO sir] because i HAVE to meet you in person. you are TOO amazing. THANK YOU FOR EVERRYYYYTHINGGG!! we are definitely more than just internet friends! i <3>
Love,
the crazyy one :)
ps - GET YOUR FREAKING PHONE BACK!! i miss talking to you; and i have SOOO much to tell you. you have missed quite a bit in the past few days honey.
please excuse my absence.
i just had one of the most EPIC weekends i have ever had in my entire life.
i absolutely LOVE my brother, his friends, and florida.
however, i now know that i canNOT go to florida for undergrad.
...i'll flunk out :(. too much fun to have!
a QUICK run down
[simply because even if i gave you EVERY detail you could not understand how amazing this was, and how much i NEEDED this vacation :)].
thursday: got in pretty late. almost missed my connection flight. ran to my next flight in about 2 seconds! ha.
got to brothers house. took flight with wiz ;). watched funny movies till the a.m.
friday: wake up; bake up. met up with some of his friends. they were AMAZING. i <3 those girls!! we were supposed to go swimming, but we got side tracked. haha. ended up doing a goodwill and other various stores run. NAP TIME!! then party at brick house [in which i stayed in my brothers room and partied with the amazing girls i just mentioned :). so fun!].
saturday: chilled ALLL day. watched soccerrrrr :). then went to st. augustine! oh gosh. this is where things got amazing. got to where we were staying. BEAUTIFUL HOUSE!! ate some food; played some soccer; walked down to the pier and watched those crazy kids swim with alligators. took a break. then went back to the pier and lit off fireworks. AMAZING!
sunday: woke up to the most epic breakfast ever. blueberry pancakes; banana nut pancakes; grits; eggs; & fruit. yummmmm! went to another friends house towards the beach. played drinking games. rode our bikes to another party and then to the beach. hung out on the beach. came back to the house. had some AWESOME food off the grill. went back to the beach to watch fireworks...&& the rest of the night was a blurrrr [but to give you an idea...fireworks ended at 10, and things are blurred from there till about 4 am :)].
monday; woke up. ran some errands. headed to the airport. flight got delayed so i got to stay in gainesville. came back to the house, took a nap. woke up and PARTIEDDDDD HARDD! took a triiiipppp w/molly. went to see steve aoki @ the club. 3 hours of non stop DANCING to techno. super awesome. came back to brick house PARTIED in my brothers room. went to mcdonalds @ like 4 am. yummy breakfast food; then sleep.
tuesday: i came home :(.
^^thats how epic my weekend was. i hope yours was fun :)^^.
ps - the letters i have missed will be posted periodically throughout the day. reality is kicking my butt right now. i have SO much to do. [it was worth it tho!]
i absolutely LOVE my brother, his friends, and florida.
however, i now know that i canNOT go to florida for undergrad.
...i'll flunk out :(. too much fun to have!
a QUICK run down
[simply because even if i gave you EVERY detail you could not understand how amazing this was, and how much i NEEDED this vacation :)].
thursday: got in pretty late. almost missed my connection flight. ran to my next flight in about 2 seconds! ha.
got to brothers house. took flight with wiz ;). watched funny movies till the a.m.
friday: wake up; bake up. met up with some of his friends. they were AMAZING. i <3 those girls!! we were supposed to go swimming, but we got side tracked. haha. ended up doing a goodwill and other various stores run. NAP TIME!! then party at brick house [in which i stayed in my brothers room and partied with the amazing girls i just mentioned :). so fun!].
saturday: chilled ALLL day. watched soccerrrrr :). then went to st. augustine! oh gosh. this is where things got amazing. got to where we were staying. BEAUTIFUL HOUSE!! ate some food; played some soccer; walked down to the pier and watched those crazy kids swim with alligators. took a break. then went back to the pier and lit off fireworks. AMAZING!
sunday: woke up to the most epic breakfast ever. blueberry pancakes; banana nut pancakes; grits; eggs; & fruit. yummmmm! went to another friends house towards the beach. played drinking games. rode our bikes to another party and then to the beach. hung out on the beach. came back to the house. had some AWESOME food off the grill. went back to the beach to watch fireworks...&& the rest of the night was a blurrrr [but to give you an idea...fireworks ended at 10, and things are blurred from there till about 4 am :)].
monday; woke up. ran some errands. headed to the airport. flight got delayed so i got to stay in gainesville. came back to the house, took a nap. woke up and PARTIEDDDDD HARDD! took a triiiipppp w/molly. went to see steve aoki @ the club. 3 hours of non stop DANCING to techno. super awesome. came back to brick house PARTIED in my brothers room. went to mcdonalds @ like 4 am. yummy breakfast food; then sleep.
tuesday: i came home :(.
^^thats how epic my weekend was. i hope yours was fun :)^^.
ps - the letters i have missed will be posted periodically throughout the day. reality is kicking my butt right now. i have SO much to do. [it was worth it tho!]
Sunday, July 4, 2010
4th of July.
My fourth of July consist of riding bikes
hanging out on the beach
hitting up bars
and being with some of the coolest people everrrr!
tooooo excited :D
Thursday, July 1, 2010
letter to an ex.
Dear (best) friend,
Well, you have ALWAYS known that I am better at writing out things than speaking them so I’ll let it all out now. I love you with every ounce of my heart, I always have & I always will. We have been through some things together. The very first time we got together was one of the most amazing times of my life (tears and all). It was beautiful how much love we had for each other so instantaneously. You are the only person I let get close enough to me to hurt me. You are the only person I let past my wall. However, to this day I have yet to figure out if I made you the way you are or if I was just too infatuated at the time to realize this was always you. Regardless I am sorry I pushed you away, and I’m sorry for any pain I may have caused you (but trust me, it was not one sided; it hurt me too). You know me like the back of your hand (damn near better than I know myself), and you have always been there for me. I cannot thank you enough for that. You have put a smile on my face when I was ready to break. For a while, you were my strength. Nothing I do can show you how grateful I am for that. As weird as this sounds, you taught me how to be a good girlfriend. You stuck by me through being a bad one and helped me into the one I am capable of being. Thank you. The one thing you don’t know (or at least to my knowledge you don’t know) is I know more than you think. Every time (after the first time) that we tried a relationship I know you weren’t faithful to me. I knew you were cheating on me physically and emotionally. However, I loved you too much to let you go. We are PERFECT for each other, and I did not want to let that go even though it hurt to know that I was not enough. That’s how much I cared about you and I. However, I can’t do that anymore. It’s time for us to both let go and move on. I hope that if I am the reason you are no longer faithful (due to me hurting you the first time) then I pray that there is a girl that can restore your faith in love and cause you to be faithful again because you deserve to love and be loved the right way. Thank you for everything you have taught me, all the times you have been there for me, and all the times you have hurt me. They mean a lot to me. You are a beautiful person inside and out. You are unbelievably intelligent, and you have a huge heart for those you care about. Never lose that. I will always be here for ANYTHING you need. Please, don't ever hesitate to call me. I love you more than you will ever know or understand despite what you or anyone else thinks or says.
Well, you have ALWAYS known that I am better at writing out things than speaking them so I’ll let it all out now. I love you with every ounce of my heart, I always have & I always will. We have been through some things together. The very first time we got together was one of the most amazing times of my life (tears and all). It was beautiful how much love we had for each other so instantaneously. You are the only person I let get close enough to me to hurt me. You are the only person I let past my wall. However, to this day I have yet to figure out if I made you the way you are or if I was just too infatuated at the time to realize this was always you. Regardless I am sorry I pushed you away, and I’m sorry for any pain I may have caused you (but trust me, it was not one sided; it hurt me too). You know me like the back of your hand (damn near better than I know myself), and you have always been there for me. I cannot thank you enough for that. You have put a smile on my face when I was ready to break. For a while, you were my strength. Nothing I do can show you how grateful I am for that. As weird as this sounds, you taught me how to be a good girlfriend. You stuck by me through being a bad one and helped me into the one I am capable of being. Thank you. The one thing you don’t know (or at least to my knowledge you don’t know) is I know more than you think. Every time (after the first time) that we tried a relationship I know you weren’t faithful to me. I knew you were cheating on me physically and emotionally. However, I loved you too much to let you go. We are PERFECT for each other, and I did not want to let that go even though it hurt to know that I was not enough. That’s how much I cared about you and I. However, I can’t do that anymore. It’s time for us to both let go and move on. I hope that if I am the reason you are no longer faithful (due to me hurting you the first time) then I pray that there is a girl that can restore your faith in love and cause you to be faithful again because you deserve to love and be loved the right way. Thank you for everything you have taught me, all the times you have been there for me, and all the times you have hurt me. They mean a lot to me. You are a beautiful person inside and out. You are unbelievably intelligent, and you have a huge heart for those you care about. Never lose that. I will always be here for ANYTHING you need. Please, don't ever hesitate to call me. I love you more than you will ever know or understand despite what you or anyone else thinks or says.
Love,
your (best) friend.
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